The Bad Country Song

"Ohhhhhh our computer crashed, our car died on the highway and we have no cash...la la la la la..."

I am not the biggest country music fan, but I think I just wrote a hit song ;)

On days like today, the sky is overcast and I am hit with an overwhelming sinking feeling.

I hate Februarys.

It seems like everything bad happens in February. No wonder they have a couple holidays in this month. Even though it is the shortest month, it feels so stinkin long and dark.

Moving on aside from my cynical tangent, today I have been struggling. I always wonder why it is so much easier to concentrate on the negative rather than the positive. For the past couple days there has been one line from a song by R-Swift called "Smile" that has been running through my head over and over... "When the money's all gone, and the bills aren't paid, don't you fret no don't you worry..."

Even as I type that, peace fills my soul.

I can't remember a time where we havn't struggled financially. In our early marriage years when we had 2 incomes, a lot of it came from lack of financial planning, and the ability to handle money well and just plain stupidity. Now... it is from lack of finances. Period. I get tired of the whole encouragement to budget, set money aside, etc etc because the fact is we don't have enough money to budget let alone set aside. We have this much money and THHHHHIIIIISSSSS MUUUUUUUCHHHHHH BIIIIIILLLLLLSSSSSSSS. Pretty much our finances are FUBAR. Now, before you all go and google what FUBAR means, let me just say it is a relatively derogatory way of saying we're screwed.

It's not that we're not trying. I have a home based business but with our main computer having crashed (aka all my stuff is on there) and having no car, it is hard to move forward with it. We are trying so hard, and yet we keep on failing.

Now, I know there are MUCH BIGGER problems in this world. Trust me, I am burdened for many friends and people I know who struggle with many many things. We can all look at others and think "well ya, they're struggling, but their issue is not as great as mine..." and yet, when we're in that issue, it is all we can think about. It is all consuming.

And then there is God. Our great BIG GINORMOUS God who reaches down and envelopes us with His overwhelming sense of love and peace and who says "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest..." (Matthew 11:28 NIV)

And then I sigh.

Our God is bigger. He is greater. He can handle all.

Amen... amen... amen.